“IT’S CANON!” the mindless throng cries.
“No it isn’t!” I retort, desperation creeping into my voice. “It’s queerbaiting! It’s bad writing combined with homophobia!”
“BUT MOFFAT! PERFECT! SO GAY!”
“No!” I scream over the crowd. “Steven Moffat is an incredibly flawed writer! Look how flimsy his Doctor Who plots are! Look at the lack of a coherent theme or narrative! Look how little depth or variety his female characters have!”
“STRONG FEMALE CHARACTERS!” they screech in return.
He’s won. Steven Moffat has won. He’s acquired a completely uncritical fanbase who can’t see when they’re being toyed with and played for fools. I let out a broken sob and collapse in despair. As I fall to the ground, the crowd freezes momentarily before they all shout in tearful chorus:
keep your friends close, but your enemies closer
like really, very close
so close that you can feel your enemies breath on your neck
and you shiver with hatred and… anticipation?
turn around and look deep into your enemies eyes, letting your gaze drag down to their lips, your eyes intense with desire. push your enemies up against the wall.
make out with your enemies.
your friends, who are still close, are super uncomfortable and kinda grossed out
Disclaimer: I have never studied the Bible very closely. Most of my biblical knowledge comes from Passover seders, Christmas specials, the Good Omens fandom, and Jesus Christ Superstar. If I’ve said anything wrong here, let me know so I can edit things/apologize.
So I just realized this tonight, and frankly I’m kicking myself for not realizing this sooner. You know all the religious motifs in The Reichenbach Fall? Sinnerman, “on the side of the angels,” “IOU a fall” (and, come on, there was IOU spray painted onto a building with blackened angel wings behind it, it’s talking about The Fall, i.e. from Grace)?
It’s because The Reichenbach Fall reflects the Temptation, Sacrifice, and Resurrection of Christ, but instead of our Christ figure ascending from humanity to godhood, he descends from self-perceived godhood to humanity.
if you think the elementary v. sherlock war is nasty then you clearly weren’t in the phantom of the opera fandom circa 2005
some gems from the elementary tag
- "yeah so I watched Elementary OBJECTIVELY and wasn’t impressed. The two things that stood out to me was lucy lieu’s acting or however you spell it"
- "Watching Elementary online. Im only watching so i can see it buuuurnn >:/"
- " Conclusion: Meh.”
- "his scarf and coat are a bit similar and like ehhhhh"
- "just a reminder that you’re a fucking moron with terrible taste. typical american idiot who only likes television shows if a forced contrived romance angle is shoehorned into it. you are stupid. this is fact so don’t bother arguing, you’re just outright mentally deficient. WAH BOO HOO PEOPLE ARE BEING RUDE WAH SOB! Fucking stupid cunt."
- "NOTE: SHERLOCKED NEVER SAID ELEMENTRY MY DEAR WATSON IN THE BOOKS THIS NEW SHOW “ELEMENTARY” IS NON CANNON LOAD OF SHIT BBC IS ONE OF THE MOST FAITHFUL WELL DONE SHERLOCK ADAPTIONS THERE EVER WAS"
- "Against my better judgement, I am about to watch Elementary. [facepalm loki gif]"
- "I don’t…I don’t hate it…What is happening to me?"
- "I do hope that they tone down her emotions a tad. She seems to be a little too sensitive"
- people like you are proof that elementary is solely enjoyed by idiots with ADD
- I’m one of those that say they hate the Watson’s a woman. It’s not because I’m a sexist.
- "There’s some nitpicky things I don’t like about it, […] and of course Watson being a girl, but, whatever."
there is only one reason i do NOT want john watson to marry mary morstan
and that is the fact that john hamish watson has been shown to be a fucking terrible boyfriend, and just generally a sexist, objectifying pig thus far
so why the fuck would mary ‘awesome’ morstan marry him???????
i love you
HE IS THE WORST BOYFRIEND THOUGH LIKE HE REALLY IS
wow this is nice
So this exists.
attn: sherlock fandom-
- The price you pay for bringing up either my Chinese or American heritage (or the fact that I am a woman) as a negative is… I collect your fucking head.
- Just like this fucker here.
- Now, if any of you sons of bitches got anything else to say, now’s the fucking time!
- I didn’t think so.
- malicegeres: i will weep with sadness if he has the cane again though
- sunlightlikegold: uh i don't even want to talk about that fucking cane ok
- malicegeres: i guess you could say that without sherlock
- malicegeres: john doesn't have a leg to stand on
- malicegeres: YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
- sunlightlikegold: ..................jesus christ
Q:Sebastian always hates to disentangle himself, but he does take some pride in knowing that no one else will ever see Jim like this.